How to Endure Humbling Circumstances

My freshman year of college I had my eyes on an upperclassman named Matt. He was not in any of my classes, so I had to just admire him on campus from afar. But one day, on my way to Accounting class on the third floor, there he was ahead of me, and I really wanted him to notice me! So I picked up my pace a bit and quickly headed up the stairs, passing him on his right, when I tripped on a step and fell, dropping my books everywhere. Yup, he noticed me then!  And he honorably helped me gather my books and get back up, while I – red faced and sheepish – mumbled a quick “thank you.”

He never asked me out.

That’s just one of many times I’ve felt like a complete idiot. Been there? I can look back now and laugh at myself sprawled out on the steps, but what about the humbling situations that are more serious?  Like the loss of a job or being overlooked for a promotion. Like dealing with a chronic illness. Like enduring unjust treatment from others. Like aging. Like a severed relationship. Unforeseen circumstances arise that stir up a range of emotions – shock, confusion, anger, grief, and embarrassment. How can you and I bear up under those kinds of unwelcome trials?

In II Samuel 16, there’s an interesting story about King David. He and his royal officials are on their way to the town of Bahurim when a man named Shimei approaches David and starts cursing him. Shimei calls David “a man of blood” and “a scoundrel” as he pelts him with rocks! One of David’s men says, “How can you let this dog treat you like that? Let me cut off his head!” David basically tells his men to lay off and chill out, that God’s in control, and they continue along the road with Shimei keeping pace opposite David “throwing stones at him and showering him with dirt” all the way to Bahurim where they arrive at their destination exhausted.

I admire the restraint and humility of David in this scene. Here he is the king of Israel allowing himself to be humiliated, and in front of his men! How and why?

1. He knew God was in control of all things. David says, “Leave him alone.  Let him curse, for the Lord has told him to” (v. 11). 

2. He hoped that God would see his distress (v. 12). 

3. He trusted that God would repay him with good (v. 12).

Do you ever feel small? Snubbed by others? Demeaned or degraded by life circumstances? What can you do? Do what David did.

1. Be assured God is in control.  “In his heart a man plans his way, but the LORD directs his steps” (Prov. 16:9). I’m sure David didn’t wake up that day imagining he would be cursed at and pelted with rocks, but God directed David’s steps to encounter Shimei. “Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails” (Prov. 19:21).  We may not understand in this life why God is directing our path right through humbling circumstances (not the plans we had in mind!), but we can count on the fact that God’s will is always, always wise, good, kind, and right.

2. Be comforted that God sees your distress. Find hope in the story of Hannah who was greatly troubled by her rival Peninnah’s ruthless mockery; God saw her anguish, “the LORD remembered her,” and He gave her a son. (Read the story in I Samuel 1.) Psalm 34:8 declares this comforting truth: “The eyes of the LORD are on the righteous, and His ears are attentive to their cry.” Read that again: His eyes are on you, and He is paying attention to your cries. You are not overlooked in your sorrow. God sees your pain and cares.

3. Be confident that He will repay you with good. Remember the story of Joseph? Thrown into a pit by his brothers and sold. Falsely accused by Potiphar’s wife. Wrongly imprisoned. Forgotten by the cupbearer. Humiliated over and over. When his brothers later stood before him, Joseph said, “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives” (Gen. 50:20). Joseph recognized that God was in control all along working out His good plans, and you can be assured God is doing the same for you.

Above all, when you are going through something humbling, look to the example of the One who is Greater than King David. Jesus, the King of kings, was flogged, mocked, spit on, insulted, and hung naked on a cross, though “He committed no sin, and no deceit was found in His mouth.”  I Peter 2:23 says, “When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly.” Entrust yourself to your Righteous Judge who is watching over you with compassion and directing your every step right through this affliction for His glory and your good.

"Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time." I Peter 5:6

*The story of David’s encounter with Shimei is found in II Samuel 16:5-14.

*For more encouragement on this topic, read Psalm 37.